We know this. It’s a simple statement that’s true for every single one of us. What is left out of that statement I think, is that everyone wants to matter to some-one specifically. It’s one of the reasons a rockstar can perform to thousands cheering “I love you” but go home feeling empty. Everyone wants to matter to someone, some ONE in this world – specifically. It’s one reason we never really get over mom. It’s one of the reasons that soldiers, dying and battle will call for their mother in their last moments. This is the relationship that was the most important in our lives because this is the person who loved us more than they loved themselves. Disclaimer here: I’m aware that there are terrible moms in the world, and that many people have had a terrible experience and relationship with their mother. I suggest that these people carry wounds from this that affect the rest of their lives. Some heal them, some even die from them because this relationship is that important. Perhaps one of the reasons marriage is still fashionable in this day and age when women can support themselves financially and there are no bears to be beaten from our doorstep. Marriage is (We hope) the place we will find a person who loves us enough that a tragedy in our life is a tragedy in theirs. We hope this will be someone who shares our dreams, hopes, and life. So, we do want to matter and ultimately the most important way to feel that is through what we contribute to the world and how we feel about living up to our own standards and moralities – we can only achieve this when we have/had the security of feeling there was/is some ONE in our lives to whom we completely matter. Once that sense of self and security is in us, we are free.